Instead of complaining about hotels who don’t treat us like kings (for compensation), and instead of teaching how to be a tool to the hotels, I think this community needs a “how not to be a self-entitled ‘Platinum’ member and how to treat staff like people 101 class”.
Am I “pro-conusmer”? No. Am I pro-big-corporation? Heck no! (Although the response at the end of this post from the hotel GM brings me odd amounts of joy).
I’m pro-not-being-a-tool. I don’t care if the hotel deeply wronged you by making you wait in the lobby, don’t be a tool. However, I find so many people on TripAdvisor are so dumb they shouldn’t be allowed to review hotels. In fact, so many leave complaints on the wrong hotel, or complain about the restaurant (or mall) next to the hotel, or leave reviews when they’ve never been in the door. Like the people below…
But my favorite TA review ever may come from this self-entitled tool who stayed at the Hyatt Regency Phuket (where I am now). Couldn’t help but notice this and turn it into a post.
Okay this is really about entertainment, but it makes me sympathize for hotels because you know this effects their revenue. Tools I tell ya.
HORROR at the Hyatt Phuket!
Let me give you some highlights from this incredibly long review. (I do a summary of the review below in the text, so you can skip the pic).
“The horror started from the arrival pick-up… We ordered a Mercedes E Class airport pick-up. To our dismay, we were received by a 7 seater van.”
* Facepalm *
Can you imagine… having to sit… in a van…
I can’t even say it.
A van where perhaps middle class people have sat? Like why else would they be in a van?
“In the van, no cold towels and bottled water. Not even soft music in the van.”
Now I’ve stayed in a lot of 4 & 5 star hotels… but is the soft music in the van, is that a thing? Or was this guy just wanting to start his romantic vacation asap!?
“We were made to wait at the lobby while staff was checking us in. Then came a staff with water and cold towels on a tray and left it on a table next to us. So we are suppose to help ourselves??”
I’m speechless. Like, were they supposed to dump that drink down your throat? Were they supposed to wipe the towel all over your face? All that waiting to check in and no towel massage?
Seriously. What in the world were they supposed to do with that towel and drink?
On second thought… I don’t wanna know.
But wait until you hear about the poor conditions of the room!
The second bedroom bed was slanting to the side. I wonder if a supervisor had actually checked the suite before allowing guests to enter.
Hmm… I wonder if the “supervisor of bed straightening” was just off or what?
“Unfortunately, in this instance, my vacation was ruined”
That is truly a horror. All these are genuine problems. … Not!
I wish this guy had more reviews to read. Luckily he likes the DoubleTree nearby enough to leave a 3 star review. Since he is a self-proclaimed “hotelier” (something he states at the end of the Hyatt review), he was able to well articulate exactly why the DoubleTree was so nice… like, “Pool was big and plenty of room for adults and kids.” Both!? At the same time? Now that. That is a big pool.
This guy is a “hotelier”… wanna be associated with that?
Sorry the hotel isn’t responsible for India, tool.
In Amritsar, India (which is really cool), one of the nicer hotels we stayed at was the Country Inn & Suites and it was only 9,000 points! Steal.
But here someone complains about the view and has a picture titled “Another unexciting view”.
This is what India looks like you douche. Sorry it wasn’t exciting. The view the other direction was a crowded crappy street. They just shouldn’t open hotels there, eh?
But seriously, you’re going to leave a negative review of this Indian hotel because outside the window it looks like India? I know, you could travel with a beach poster the size of a window. That way when you get somewhere you don’t like, you can cover up the window with something exciting.
No. Wait. You’re right. The hotel should be the one printing out pictures of the Maldives and covering their windows.
If TripAdvisor was a loitering rating system, the IC Danang would get 1 star.
(I’ll also breakdown this review in the text below the pic).
Let me sum up what happened here.
“I was in Da Nang a month ago staying at another 5 star resort… I had rented a motorbike for a few days… We drove up to the gate and we were told to leave as visitors were not allowed in to see the hotel. Now, this is the first time in my life that I have been told I am not allowed to check out the property. Very surprised and bitterly disappointed.”
Are you kidding me? Do you have any idea what TripAdvisor is for?
Thanks for warning all of the potential bums out there who were hoping to hang out on the InterContinental’s beach that they too would likely be denied access. If it weren’t for this review, I would have no idea that you first need a reservation. *blinks*
This tells us nothing about the hotel. Do people not understand that you actually have to stay at a hotel to be able to rate it properly?
Again, if TripAdvisor was a loitering rating system, the IC Danang would get 1 star. Agreed. But it’s not.
But the best part of this review is the response from the General Manager.
On TA the hotel is allowed one public response to a review. 99.99% of the time the management responds to negative reviews with an apology and says something like “we hope to see you again.”
This response was baller.
I am quite puzzled by your review to say the least hence the reason why I have taken so long to respond as it is the first time we received a comment on a stay in our Resort without the guest having stayed in it!!
Yes, how’s that not a rule? And it’s funny to see a GM use two exclamation marks!!
Our Resort is very unique and very exclusive indeed and we have certain parameters for outside guests to visit to protect our exclusive guests’ privacy and comfort. Dress code is one of them.
Wait… does that mean I’m not allowed in?
We therefore do not allow guests entering on motorbike with flip flops and non appropriate clothes for obvious reasons. I therefore suggest that if you decide to visit a top luxury Resort such as ours, you dress appropriately which will avoid such disagreement.
(So I’m definitely not allowed?)
I am however delighted to read that the privacy and exclusivity of our guests were indeed well protected.
Best. Line. Ever.
Dear Sir Girodon, I want to be the first…
Don’t be that guy. Or any of these. But especially not the first guy.
Okay, this is my new hobby. And just to give you a heads up, from now on if you see an epicly dumb review, save it. I’ll be launching my first ever contest Tuesday! So stay tuned.
Contests to me are generally dumb, boring and obviously a marketing scheme. But if there is a funny/entertaining, creative and helpful contest… I’m all about that. Contest it is folks.
Be exited, mmk?